Why Am I Even Doing This?

The question comes up more often than people admit: Why am I even doing this?

Some days you don’t feel it. You don’t want to show up. You don’t want to fight again. That’s when it’s important to know the difference between motivation and dedication.

Motivation doesn’t last

Motivation feels good. It’s a spark. It can move you in the moment, the TED Talk that gives you a ten-minute high, the playlist that gets you through one workout, the sermon that makes you want to change the world.

But sparks burn out. And if all you’ve got is sparks, you’ll always be waiting on the next one.

Dedication is what keeps the fire going

Dedication is the log. Logs are harder to get. You have to chop them, carry them, prepare them. But once they catch, they sustain the fire through the night.

Quick sparks will make a flame. Dedication is what keeps it alive when nobody is cheering, when nothing feels easy, when the outcome is still uncertain.

Motivation is about the moment. Dedication is about the mission.

The why is what keeps you coming back

Your why is the thing that keeps knocking, even when every door has been slammed in your face.

It’s what fuels your emotional integrity. It’s what makes you toss and turn at night. It’s the voice that says, “I cannot stop until this is done.”

Without a why, emotional integrity has nothing to hold onto. And without that, you’re building fires out of twigs, they flare up and fade fast.

With a why, the fire may die down, but it won’t die out. Dedication keeps feeding it. Preparation keeps fueling it.

Dedication in advocacy

This is where it shows up the clearest.

You don’t always feel like showing up after the tenth “no.” That isn’t motivation anymore. That’s dedication.

Dedication is standing with someone when both of you are tired. It’s saying, “We may not see results today, but justice is still worth the fight.”

Advocacy isn’t glamorous. It is preparation, persistence, trust, and slow progress. But even slow progress is still progress. And when change finally comes, it may look sudden to the outside world. You’ll know it wasn’t sudden at all. It was dedication all along.

Closing

So, when the question comes, "Why am I even doing this?", remember where your fire comes from.

Motivation may light the match. Dedication is what keeps the logs burning. And your why is the reason you keep coming back to the woodpile.

Because sparks fade. Logs endure. And advocacy requires a fire that doesn’t quit.