When people hear the word feedback, their stomach drops. Most folks treat it like a polite word for criticism. But here is the truth: feedback is not inherently positive or negative. Feedback is information.

Better yet, feedback is data plus perception. The data is the fact, the observation, the measurable thing. “We hit 80 percent of our sales target.” That is data. The perception is the human layer we add on top: “I am frustrated we missed it,” “I think the team did not try hard enough,” or “I feel worried about our momentum.” Both exist. And the goal in any healthy culture of feedback is to get as close to neutral as possible. Acknowledge the perception, but ground yourself in the data.

Why Feedback Matters

Feedback is the fuel for growth. It tells people where they stand and what direction they can move in. It can save relationships, improve performance, and build trust if we handle it right.

Think about the old company photo. Let us pretend they still gather everyone in the lobby once a year. The photographer says, “Hey, slide two steps to the left.” Nobody gets offended. We just move. Nobody storms off muttering, “How dare they attack my positioning.” But at work? Somebody says, “Hey, could you tighten up that report?” and suddenly we are spiraling. Why is it neutral in the photo but threatening in the office? Because the photographer does not know us, and we know they are just trying to make sure the VP is not blinking in the front row.

But in the workplace, relationships, histories, and perceptions all come bundled in. That is why building a culture of feedback is so important. It keeps us from letting that bundle of emotion sabotage growth.

Feedback Is a Roundabout, Not a One-Way Street

In a healthy workplace, feedback does not just flow top down. It moves in every direction: supervisor to employee, peer to peer, employee to supervisor.

That is why I call it a roundabout. You can enter from any lane. At some point, you may have to cut across to another road, and yes, it might be uncomfortable. But the roundabout only works when everyone respects the flow.

And if you have ever driven a Texas roundabout, you know. If one person panics or refuses to yield, everybody gets stuck. That is exactly what happens when feedback only flows top down.

Now let us be real. This does not magically happen just because we say “we have an open culture.” It has to be built. People need to feel emotionally safe. Leaders need to suspend titles in the moment. A true roundabout culture means the custodian can give feedback to the CEO without fear. Because if a CEO says something harmful to an employee, should that employee just sit there and take it? That is the kind of culture that makes everybody grow.

How to Give Feedback

Giving feedback is an art. Here are the pieces that matter most:

✨ Detach data from emotion.
The fact is the fact. Keep it clean before layering in your reaction. Instead of “You failed to hit quota,” say, “We are at 80 percent of quota.” That is the data.

✨ Keep data separate from praise or criticism.
One reason people take data so personally is because it often gets delivered mixed in with praise or criticism. When you bundle them together, people stop hearing the data and start hearing judgment. Let the data stand on its own, then add the next layer. If you are giving praise, make it specific: “We hit 100 percent of our sales target. I noticed how quickly you followed up with leads, and that consistency mattered.” If you are offering constructive criticism, frame it as growth: “We are at 80 percent of quota. Here are a couple of things that might help us close the gap.” The separation matters because people often conflate data with their self-worth, their talent, or their ability. Keeping those categories clean makes feedback easier to hear.

✨ Know the person.
Some people want it in writing 24 hours in advance. Some want it live. Some prefer a quick heads-up first. If you can, ask them how they like to receive feedback.

✨ Intent versus impact.
You might mean well, but if the way you deliver it lands differently, that is still your responsibility to address.

✨ Be kind, not just nice.
Nice avoids. Kind names the thing. Being nice lets people slide into bad habits. Being kind gives them clarity and a chance to get better.

✨ Name it and support it.
This is the missing piece. Naming the problem is not enough. You can say, “The report was late,” all day long. But if you do not offer a path forward, you have left that person holding a problem with no way out. That is not feedback, that is a complaint. Real feedback sounds like: “The report came in late. What would help us keep it on time next week? Do you need a template? A check-in before the deadline?” That is what keeps relationships and cultures healthy. Feedback plus support is where trust grows.

How to Receive Feedback

Here is the harder side: taking it. Because let us be honest, nobody wakes up excited to hear about what they could have done better.

✨ Name your state.
If you are not ready, say so. “I am not in a place to receive feedback right now, but can we circle back in 30 minutes?” Advocate for what you need.

✨ Direct does not mean unkind.
Just because someone gives you feedback without wrapping it in warmth does not mean they are out to hurt you. Some people are just direct. If they name the action, that is still feedback. Lots of folks do not love direct delivery, but that is also where your voice matters. You can say, “I hear you, but sometimes direct feedback makes it harder for me to fully receive it. Would you mind sending it in writing or giving me more context?” Advocate for your needs, because many people can adjust their approach if you ask.

✨ Listen, do not load a rebuttal.
Feedback is not a courtroom cross-examination. Not everything requires a defense. Sometimes the right move is to just say, “Thank you for your feedback.” Chili’s does not send a waiter running into the parking lot yelling, “Why did you not like the nachos?!” They log your feedback, maybe change the recipe, maybe not, and life goes on. Workplace feedback needs more humanity than a chain restaurant survey, but the principle still stands: you do not need to fight everything.

✨ Remember you have a choice.
Unless it is life or death feedback like a pilot mid-flight, you can choose whether or not to implement it. Every choice has consequences, but you still have agency.

✨ Reframe it as a toolkit.
Think of feedback like tools in a box. Some you use every day, like a hammer. Others seem random, like that weird Allen wrench you only need once in a blue moon. But when the day comes, you will be glad you kept it. Feedback makes you more versatile, more prepared, and more able to help others.

Closing

Feedback is not punishment. It is not praise. It is data plus perception. And when we strip it down to that, and then build it back up with support, kindness, and safety, we create workplaces where everyone grows.

The culture of feedback is a roundabout. Everybody can enter, everybody can exit, and the flow only works when respect is built in. Name the thing, support the solution, receive it with openness, and keep adding tools to your box. That is how you build a workplace where feedback is not feared. It is hunted down, because everyone knows it is the key to getting better.